Gone are those days when people sneered at Anne Bancroft as Mrs. Robinson trying to seduce a young Dustin Hoffman in ‘The Graduate’. These days, Demi Moore doesn’t shy away from strutting with her toyboy Ashton Kutcher. Keep in mind age is just a number. Compatibility and communication, not calendar years, keep a relationship going. Her experience, if combined with your energy and intelligence, can surely lead to a mind-blowing chemistry.
Here are some tips for making your dating hour with older women a roaring success:
Elder women yearn for respect far more than the younger lot. So, pay her the respect she deserves. Don’t ever show that you are doing any mercy to her by taking her out for a date.
Never try to remind her of her actual age and don’t ever take advantage of her age. Showing embarrassment in front of her due to your age gap can make her feel awkward.
Two persons from two separate generations can surely share the same likings. Make her favorite movies and music your topic of discussion.
Use every sort of superlatives while complementing on her looks, make-up, hairstyle and sense of dressing. Try to mention the best of her features. Make her feel like a queen.
Stop from reminding her of her previous unsuccessful relationships and failed marriages. It can spoil her date. You can ask her about her about her past experiences, but you should also know when and where to draw the line. Don’t force her to speak about her ex-husband or former boyfriend. Always try to concentrate on such topics in which she is comfortable to converse.
There’s no need to feel that your lack of experience may become an obstacle in your relationship. Instead, try to sharpen those qualities of yours that have lured the older lady to go on a date with you. If she is not concerned about the age difference, then it mustn’t bother you either.
She may have come for a date to rejuvenate her love life. Make her day by presenting her a bouquet of roses. Make your sense of humor your strongest weapon. Making her laugh too often indicates you two are going ahead for a steady and healthy liaison.
If you try too hard to look and act like a matured guy, then it may turn her off, because it’s your youth and exuberance that have drawn her closer to you. Be yourself and if showing a little bit of immaturity makes her heart aflutter, then let it be. Give her some time to understand your level of maturity.
Behave like a gentleman when she introduces you in her circle of friends. They may not accept your relationship easily, so keep your cool. You are free to ‘back out’ at the last moment if your dating situation turns out to be too serious for you.
Never develop such notion that she has lost the appetite for sex. She needs as much as sexual pleasure as you do. Remember that with age, certain changes take place in a woman’s body that leads to slower rate of sexual arousal. So, you are supposed to be a bit more patient while initiating sexual foreplay and act accordingly. But, instead rushing for sex, spend precious time discussing about each other’s hobbies and passions. Keep talking about your innermost fantasies. That can help in igniting her lost passion.
Your ego may get a huge blow if you see her more successful in the professional sphere. How will you feel when your financially more affluent partner pays the bill after dinner? So, try to reach a compromise through discussion with your partner and make her understand your situation.
Dating an older woman doesn’t mean that you will leave all your work and join the party she is enjoying along with her friends. There should be enough space between your and her social lives. If you devote considerable amount of time in your own activities besides meeting her regularly, then it will surely help in earning her admiration. Your success will make her smile and she will be proud of you.
Older women, being naturally insecured, are often jealous of their younger counterparts. So, your words of reassurance are essential to calm her down. Always be caring and nurturing towards them. If you serve her food in your on hands, she will be more than happy. Be her strong support system at the time of despair.
Don’t assume that being younger, you will take an upper hand in the relationship. Don’t throw tantrums and act like a spoilt brat when things are not going your way. Never try to play with her emotions. She may not be forgiving always. If she feels, she may teach you a lesson or two. She has seen a lot more of life. So, never take her for granted.
And… after a few dates…
Ask yourself whether you are ready to become the stay-at-home-dad of her children from previous marriage. What will be your answer?
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